Tuesday, May 24, 2011

One more day...

One more day until the gammagram and finally some news. I either get to stop worrying or I turn myself into a whirling dervish who is on a one-way path to getting better. In the meantime I have walked the last two evenings to get some movement going with this body and to help deal with the feelings of nervousness.

I need to stop bullshitting myself about this whole bit with my diabetes. My glucose numbers are all out of whack because I am only taking one Metformin pill a day instead of the four I was taking because of all my bowel explosion issues. I am still taking Glipizide and my Victoza shot but it seems that all I eat is carbs, carbs, and more carbs. I have at least got myself to the point where I am taking my blood sugar numbers once a day; all this after months of hardly any readings.

It's time to start really thinking about what I am eating and exercising regularly again. I feel better when I eat better and I move more, yet I am a slack ass and I don't do it nearly enough. Time to pull out my Geneen Roth books, dust them off, and find those pages that ring true for me.

How is it that we as women often sabotage ourselves as if we don't deserve to be fit and healthy? We put ourselves last on the list and I don't even have a family of my own to take care of, no hubby anymore or kiddos, so what the heck is my reason for acting so piss poor lately? Why do I let myself fall apart and gel into this giant body?

It's time to focus on me more and getting healthier. I can win the fight against diabetes and I can get it under control again. I have summer vacation coming up and I will have all sorts of time to take care of me in many different ways.

Wishing you health and happiness, Weebs

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