Tuesday, May 29, 2012

What a surprise!

I know you see information about your credit scores on television all the time.  Frankly, I have been scared to know what my numbers were.  Then I got a packet in the mail today from the credit union.  It contained my three credit scores from the three major companies that compile them.

And, I am NOT at the rock bottom of the credit heap!

In fact, I think my score is a lot higher than I ever thought it would be. 

I'm shocked!

I guess sometimes we're more afraid of what we don't know so we keep it pushed to the side, in the dark, hidden away.  We pretend that if we don't deal with it, that it must be okay.  But, deep down inside, we take little peeks and look at that dark corner and tell ourselves that it is too scary, too hard, too impossible to deal with and then we close ourselves off again.

What the hell have I been waiting for?  Silly me for being scared of a number that doesn't define me solely, but a number that I needed to know anyway.

Like the number on the scale.

That's a number, a big one, one that puts me squarely in the morbidly obese category but you have to know where you are so you can know where in God's creation you are going.  Maybe one of these days I'll post that number on here but I'm not ready yet.

I am, however, going to get a new scale so I can start looking at that number and reminding myself that that number is one piece of me.  A piece of me that needs to change but a piece of me that doesn't change all the many good parts of me.

I may be a fat girl but I'm still a great person.

Monday, May 28, 2012

Weeble's World: Beyond the Messy Stuff

Okay, I have been a-w-a-y for a long time.  Months and months (six in total) in fact.  Heck, it's a whole new year since I last posted.  I have not had much to write about on the MS front and wanted to take a break from just being a person with illnesses and writing about it.

So why am I back?  I guess I have some new challenges coming up.  One is mental and physical and the other is mental and fiscal.  What am I talking about?

1.)  I have a consultation in a few weeks to see if I am a candidate for gastric bypass.  This is not common knowledge yet so ye few stragglers who get this delivered to their inboxes will know long before some of my other pals.

Why gastric bypass?  I have had a lot of health issues that have limited my ability to walk, to move, to even get dressed.  I am swollen, retaining water, and have extremely tight muscles.  I am tired of living only a partial life and I want to be healthy again.  I'd love to be physically active again; I'd love to see my feet, cross my legs, and walk any distance without huffing and puffing again. 

I think this surgery will be saving my life.

2.)  I am preparing to purchase a house, my first home that I would actually own.  I have had it with the apartment scene because my neighbors are known drug dealers and their ne'er do well "friends" who stop by are annoying at best and their domestic disturbances, including a recent arrest for one trying to kill the other has made me decide that I have had ENOUGH!

I am hoping to get into a program where I put a certain amount of money aside each month and the credit union gives me a certain amount of money to use for the down payment.  That means a year of me saving and not spending willy nilly on stamping goodies and 31 bags!  I know I can do this but it will be tough.  I need to focus on the long haul and get over the short-term shopper's high.

I have specific goals and by putting them out there in the cyber world I hope to have your support in keeping them.  Feel free to call me to the carpet when I'm not doing what I should be.

And, thanks for stopping by again.  Old friends are the best!