What's up?

It seems I have been away for about a week now so I figured it was about time to get back on here. I have a phone appointment in a little while with an MSer who is thinking about making the switch to Tysabri. That has caused me to go back and do some reading of ye olde blog from way back, I mean waaaaaaaaay back. Years back so I can remember what it was like for me in the beginning. I had even forgotten I started in October of 2008, thinking it was in November.

It's a good thing I went back and looked at things. I know this MSer will have some questions for me and I am afraid I will come off as a dolt because I don't remember all my Tysabri history. Now, it's just a part of my routine every month and I have been doing so much better for at least a solid year. What a difference this medicine has made in my life!

I know not everyone has the same symptoms as I do and the same reaction to every medicine. I do know that, for me, Tysabri has been a step in the right direction. I am much better mentally, emotionally, and physically now as compared to when I first started Tysabri. As I look at the changes in my life in the past 6 months: a diagnosis of Type 2 diabetes, a change in grades at school, and the death of my father, I see that I have had ups and downs but they are normal ups and downs. Yes, my depression did get worse but I seem to be coming out of the tunnel and into the light again.

So what's up? My mood has lifted, physically I am in less pain, and I am enjoying looking forward to the small, positive, good parts of life.

Reaching out to "touch" someone

I talked on the phone tonight with a new friend I have been emailing and talking to on Facebook for a few months. She's a teacher also and doesn't live all that far away. In fact, she can watch my local TV station to see if I have the day off or a delay.

It was so nice to make a connection with her, so much so that I haven't been able to wind down yet. This coming from the girl who was sleepy at 7 p.m.

I am also reaching out to another new friend on Thursday to talk about my experience with Tysabri.

Two new pals in two different parts of the country! I'm a lucky gal. :)

Thursday eve

One of the inhabitants of my apartment is hoping for a snow day or delay tomorrow and it's not Edison kitty. I know I have a three day weekend which has Monday taken up with my Tysabri infusion for my MS and then a vet appointment for Edison in the afternoon. However, I could use an unexpected day off or at least a little more sleep.

I'm tired out and I need a little more rest. Is that too much to ask for when people all over the country have had days (plural!) off due to snow?

I'll keep you posted...

Rainy days and Sundays...

Sundays are always a bummer for me. I go into a sleepy, hibernating, depressive mode. I generally don't shower unless I actually have to leave my apartment and I don't usually leave. I skulk around my little home in a pair of shorts and yesterday's T-shirt. I sleep, read, watch a little bit of television and repeat the cycle again. I am uncertain, un-centered, off-kilter, filled with an energy I don't use. I am like a sloth: a lazy, large, sad one.

I know taking a shower would make me feel more human but I don't do it. It's almost like I am punishing myself by purposely not doing what I need.

I do this almost every Sunday now. I have been doing this for a while. When will I stop doing this to myself?

Sigh...

In other news not about my slovenliness, I have decided to do the local MS Walk again in May. I have started my team and started recruiting walkers and donations. Last year the team was in the top ten of the local walk's teams' fundraisers and I was in the top ten for individual fundraisers. Woohoo.

Let's see what we can do this year!

Two months out

My Dad died two months ago today. I did go to church with my Mom tonight and I thought about him a lot. I miss him quite a bit, especially now that there is this canyon between my mom and me. He was the fabric softener in the life of our family. He kept us from sticking together and rubbing each other the wrong way.

I am trying to start to care for my diabetes better again. I actually took my blood sugar this morning. It was high at 170. I suspect it will be high again tonight after eating a Rueben and french fries with gravy. It's the first time I've checked my sugar in about three weeks.

I went to church with my mom only after she called last week asking me if I would start to go up with her again. She wanted me to start up again and then go out to dinner with her afterwards. I told her I would let her know today and I didn't make my official decision until almost 1:30 this afternoon. I think part of why I am going is for me and not just because she wants me to go. I feel better after sitting in church, saying prayers, and being in the presence of the Lord.

This week I also saw my therapist and he said some things that were proverbially hitting the nail on the head. That man is underpaid but he is worth his skinny little weight in gold. He's tall and rather thin and then there's me all short and wide, akin to Jack Sprat and his wife from the nursery rhyme.

I also did some Just Dancing this week to get myself ready for a dancing showdown in early February. I plan to do some solid a$$ kicking in that regard. I have some friends who plan to get together so we can dance with the Wii and I've been told to bring it, not sing it, so I am dancing my pants off to show them what I can do.

You just keep walking, one foot in front of the other. I wondered how I would get to today but that's how you do it. You just keep walking and breathing.

I hope you're proud of me, Daddy.

First Monday

Today was the first Monday of 2011 and I survived. Yippee!

I made it to work okay, even though the roads were a snowy mess and visibility was quite limited between the dark and the pelting snow. I got to work and my classroom had a minor flood from the ceiling and several tiles were broken and on the floor. Welcome back, Weeble.

After work I came home from some errands and proceeded to do some Just Dance 2. I was having a great time and danced for almost 40 minutes until the phone rang. It turned out to be my college bestie from Maine. After the call ended I did another 15minutes of dancing.

The road to weight loss is paved with minutes of Just Dancing.

I need to get myself motivated and get my diabetes under control. I have not tested my blood sugars in well over a week. I haven't had my Victoza shot in days. I almost never take my Glipizide 30 minutes before I eat; I generally take it as I eat. Sometimes I don't take my two doses of Metformin. The diabetes stuff is just out of control but I don't think my numbers are too bad off. Then again, it's hard to know for sure when I'm not testing.

Get it together Weeble before some real damage is done! You can do this, girl.

I see my therapist on Wednesday afternoon and that is another step in the right direction.

My MS symptoms are under better control today also.

All in all, today wasn't bad for the first Monday back to work after vacation.

MS in the New Year

I have been having issues on and off, all week long with my back. I blame that completely on my MS. Today things are off with my back and my legs. There's a tightness in my back and some weakness in my legs.

Just in time to go back to work!

Oh, that MS is a tricky master...

My mom also called tonight and asked me to go back to mass with her on Saturdays. I guess that is more thawing of the iceberg, something I didn't really expect now. Maybe she feels bad or guilty about what was said a few weeks ago. I'm not sure. I'm just glad I see my therapist this week so I can talk this all out.

Until then I will be dealing with the MS symptoms and hoping this is just an anomaly.

Welcome to 2011

We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day. ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce

Welcome to your new opportunity and I hope you enjoy writing your chapters in 2011!

I don't make resolutions really but I do aim to be a better person than I was the day before. I figure it doesn't cost much to smile at someone or say a few kind words. I may have limited financial resources and sometimes limited mobility, but small kindnesses can be extended that might change a person's day.

Happy New Year, friends!